This guy had trouble saving the world…
I wanted nothing more than to be like him and do my own version of saving the world, which is why I struck out from the paradise I found myself living in to do so.
I no longer kick myself for leaving Hawaii, I used to do this often and would really beat myself up about it… it was a paradise found, and yet, it is one amongst many, there are many places of beauty in the world and until it is firmly rooted within me, there is no point in forcing myself to a place because it mimics what I wished myself to be.
The only thing is, I did it all wrong. I came out of the gate full of hubris and big ideas with little to back them up other than a vast amount of internal fire and some basic notions. I was trying to be “somebody”, rather than just being me….
I hadn’t yet learned how things work in the world, even though I have spent so many years figuring out all the things I did and didn’t want to do for my own life personally, learning about all the industries and their effects on the planet, how to grow seeds to plants and how to heal people, I learned so much except for how it all fits together on a scale that doesn’t need to include me as it’s center.
In the process of doing this I have done nothing but frustrate and confuse myself while slowly draining my bank account. How much money and time I spent trying to move mountains never once even thinking to ask, does anyone want this mountain moved, and even if they do, is where I am moving it to where it is wanted?
So what now? Well, I for sure want to ride my bike around the world, that goes without saying as it is one of the funnest things I have done to date and really don’t want to be doing anything else, except of course if an opportunity to sail comes along, that would be rad as well as is now going to b a part of my ride. As are trains, car rides, flying carpets, maybe a lift from Pegasus and who knows what else. I want to be back on an adventure, that’s what I had when I left home, in the process of crossing the states and coming down into Mexico it has turned into a non stop battle for me, and why should it be so?
Back to Magic.
Now it is time to simply enjoy the ride and where life takes me. If I get the chance to do “good things” for people, of course I am the first in line and will shed my blood to do so.
I simply will no longer be trying to “make things happen”. I’m just not that guy it turns out. I’ll leave that to the movers and shakers.
I don’t want to be saddled with the thought that I must do a certain thing or act in a certain way when it isn’t really the case anyway, it’s just another way to bang my head against the wall.
For those who have been following with me from the beginning, muchas gracias, for you I guess the only change will be a much happier ninja on patrol, less frantic and upset always trying to DO stuff. After all, it isn’t my job to save the world, it’s yours, and I am happy to be help out=]