I get a choice, I either laugh or cry and then one day I die, I will judge myself on my death bed for the times I could have laughed instead of cried, and since I am dying, I will not be able to lie or rationalize, I will see with the clarity that only comes from the last moments of life… so… in the immortal words of the joker, “if you gotta go,go with a smile=]”

“Do or do not, there is no try.”  Yoda
“On the road of life you get flat tires, fix them and keep rollin'”  Me
“Live vicariously through yourself”  Me

I drove to a party in Tijuana tonight.  It is a Couchsurfing party, but thats not why I am writing this, one party is ususaly as good as any other, ending as most do, with lots of trash and people rubbing sore heads the next day;….  No, my reason is that I drove.
If you have never driven in Tijuana, I cannot say Mexico as I do not know what it is like anywhere else, but here, in Tijuana, it is a lesson in Zen, going with the flow, it reminds me of a river gong through many twists and turns, a river with great force behind it.
For one, the rules of the road are faily basic, do not hit or be hit, close calls are the norm and a hairs breadth is how they are measured.  the stop signs seem to be more a suggestion than a demand.  At one point I turned to Carolina and said, “goodness, I just mossed a stop sign…”
She smiled politely and said, “that was the 6th one.”
There is a level of awareness you must have, yo actually have to be paying attention to what is going on in the road, to what is happening around you.  Insurance is rare and a penalty for killing someone is actually severe, not a question of whose fault, but more that I alife was lost, there are actual consuqunces beyond a raise in insurance.
This was driving with a car, small pick up to be exact, now, from the saddle of my bike, the ninja.
At first, it is, well, for me, it was very scary, the rules of the road, as I said before are kind of suspended.  Being on a bike suspends them further, trying to stay on the shoulder of the road for me is a near impossibility as this would require a mountain bike with suspension, so I find myself in the thick of it…
Its fun, again, its like a river, only now I am a leaf following the flow, not the water, i must watch out for the cars, busses, pedestrians, so many things, random holes and slashes in the surface which cold topple me into the flow where i would surely drown.
At the end of the day I feel safer, again, people do not want to hit me, further, the drivers are very aware of what is going on, further improved by the day-glo orange vest given to me as a gift by my freind Uncle Billy.  Interesting, Uncle Billy, thelast time I heard that name I was in Hawaii…=]
I feel safer was what I was saying, much safer than the states, as there is such a blanket of laws that there are stories of people purposely hitting cyclists and getting away scott free, If I got hit here, it is almost assured that the hitter would have a very bad day indeed.  Of course at the speed at which things happen here, I would as well, but, we neednt dwell on that, it hasnt happened.
The Couchsurfing party was fantastic, hosted in a huge mansion in the hills of Tijuana, big pool, plenty of opportunities to practicar mi espagnol, an impromptu eye exam and flushing by a med student on a motorcycle rider from the Netherlands who opened his visor while driving and got something in his eye at 60km and hour.
The family I am staying with here in Tijuana is so kind to me, that I find myself waiting for the “shoe to drop” at times, or I feel like a bad man, strange thing, a person or persons are very kind to me and I end up feeling like a bad man.  Now, this is something to be worked on as it really can have a negative slant on the life a person, myself, will lead.  As we know, if you wait for something, especially subconciously, seek so shall ye find, you will not be dissapointed.
I am waiting in traffic now to go back across the border to have a conversation with a camera company…  The border still mystifies me, a true expression of a very aggressive symptomatic dealing with a problem.  Is it not the companies in America who place such a high demand on illegal immigrant labor?  Do not most companies put this labor into the bottom line on the documents that are leaked to the public?  And yet, who is punished, the immigrants, usually at the business end of a gun….  so interesting for me the “way” things are done when it comes to business, no longer American business, for it is now the common denominator for how the world does business.  We have managed to export the one thing that we argue so loudly against, thereby insuring that we will never be written out of the program as it stands now, because it is us who are writing it.  Yes, Greed has been in existence for some time, and yet, if we look at simple numbers, we have the highest consumption per capita in the world, ergo, we are the greediest.  This is the prgram that we export, we control it, so it does not mattert hat we no longer produce anything, we produce the reason for producing, and the way to make extravagant waste the norm.  Its ingenious in a way, a diabolical way to be sure, but credit must be given where credit is due, the plan in itself is ingenious, its a shame that the designers never accounted for our species in the picture and only money.
This is the seed that is so often spoken of when people talk about the seed of destruction has been sown in the soil of the very crop being planetd for success.  The money seed is great, and it is so great that if left unchecked, it will devour the planet till there is nothing left for the farmer to eat.
My only glimmer of hope is that the seeds of the programs destruction will be stronger than the program itself.
I’m on diatribe, enough.
I’m getting healthier here in Mexico, my eating has normalized, I eat much less and have increased energy, my sleep is better, the amount of fresh fruit I eat has increased exponentially, my “Simple food” intake is up and I feel fantastic!  Being Vegan is at first daunting, there is a glut of meat here in Mexico, everything is meat and oft times the beans are made with manteca, a.k.a. lard.  Vegan or not, lard is a hard road to hoe for the body and I would advise that no one eat it.
Back to consumerism, I am slowly making my way to the border crossing with Caolina and my goodness.  I speak now if the roadside stores along the highway into America, the last minute shopping for Gringos going home… If supply is driven by demand, than as Americans we are telling Mexico that we love the following, cigarrettes (but you knew that), food that tastes good but will leave you inches frmo the grave, figurines (esp. Christ, Santa Maria, donkeys, spiderman, Mario, Transformers, old tyme children on benches, giant frogs, pigs, Mayan inspired pottery), Lucha Libre masks, blankets with  – Scarface, Hello Kitty, Monster energy Drinks, American football teams (esp Seahawks), Zebra and leapord prints -, regular Mexican blankets, Futbol jerseys, Mexican flagsand lastly woven hammocks that I have yet to actually see hanging from anyones house, though I have seen them in garages across the states=]
We just cossed the border, and I am happy to sum it up in a word…. C R E E P Y.
You first drive through an entire bank of photograpic arrays, I think I lost a year or so of life for the moment, literally, I spent in the midst of so many different rays that my body basically just got hit by the equivalnet of a solar flare  while standing inside a late model microwave outside of a partially melted down nuclear reactor with TV sets all around playing daytime soap operas.
Next we come to the open door of the agent and this is where it got wierd.  he looked at us in the front seat with a kind of smile and then focused on little guy in his baby seat int he back, I am Big guy by the way, one of the best nicknames I have been given to date.  Now, when I say focus, I mean it in the essence of the word, it seemed as though he was no loonger human and instead a robot with some kind of x-ray vision and he was having temporary difficulty with the lenses and had to focus them.  The look was devoid of anything human, it was a machine looking through a child to find something else, something hidden.
I was creeped out, I’ve been creeped out by the whole wall thing, all of it is just creepy.  I have yet to understand how anyone can believe we are workign towards peace when we spend ever increasing amounts on war.  In that vein, check out the book, Catch-22 by Joseph Heller, a lighthearted look at the world we live in from eyes of pilots on the war front.

And so, where am I now, time to continue packing and head for Ensenada!




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